Half-Guest Post

So we have this entire blog dedicated to making fun of Germans, so why not give the Germans a chance at making fun of us?  I asked my German BFFs what I did that they considered "typical American".  My deutsche BFFin came up with some pretty good answers.  I call this a half-guest post, because my deutsche BFFin didn't technically write this, she explained it to me and I have made it into blog-suitable form.

1) Convenience Foods - I made tacos for my two German BFFs.  Normally in the US I would buy a bag of pre-cut, pre-mixed taco lettuce, but in Germany pre-cut salad bags really don't exist.  I was at a loss.  Never in my life have I bought a simple head of lettuce before and I really did not know what to do or what to choose.  My inability to function without bags of mixed salad is apparently an American stereotype

2) Heavily Processed Foods - We were watching She-Devil and I saw a can of Easy Cheese.  I often say that the only time I feel home sick is when I think about food or my cats and the sight of Easy Cheese made me have a craving for Ritz Crackers and Easy Cheese.  Most people who know Germans would know that the thought of eating cheese out of something that resembles an aerosol can would sound terrifying to them.  To this day, she is baffled by my love for Easy Cheese.

3) Sweet Tooth - I used to take regular trips to the military base before my friend turned 23 and ceased to be a military dependent.  Occasionally would bring back food for the two of them to try.  One time, I brought over a bunch of cans of cream soda.  They didn't say it was disgusting and seeing as Germans are terribly direct people, I can only accept that they were being honest.  However, Deutsche BFFin DID try to dilute her cream soda with water because it was too sweet for her.

4) Friends - Germans are a little more careful about who they call their friends.  There are 73 other Americans in Germany with my program right now and if I tell a story about them, I would call any one of them my friend.  Germans might think this is insincere, but really, friendship isn't zero-sum.  And plus, who DOESN'T want 73 friends?